A Pregger's Night Out in a College Town

Our first extensive night out on the town since I got pg. The occasion: seeing Lucero (a band Stephen loves but I can't stand) play at Athen's most famous music venue, the 40 Watt Club. Here's my version of a pregger's night out in a college town:

9:15 We walk up to the infamous 40 Watt Club in downtown Athens and I notice a problem right away-- the marquis lists three acts for the night, not just Lucero. Thinking about my 8:30 a.m. OB appointment, I make my last attempt to get out of going to the show. "Are there going to be two openers? I really don't want to be here until 2:00 in the morning." Stephen ignores me and keeps walking.
9:25 It's our turn to pay for tickets, and I'm feeling like an old pro. Hand the lady with the scary piercings the money, show the guy with a million tattoos the ID, then place your hand in front of him for a stamp.
9:26 Ahhh... we're in! We triumphantly take the best seat in the house, and wait for something to happen. I survey the club, which isn't nearly as glamorous as I'd imagined. I start taking pictures of the light fixtures, because there's nothing else to do.

9:45 A few more people have trickled in, but there's no sign of a musician anywhere, and someone is starting to get hungry (Babble, of course!). I'm not in the mood to get faint from being pg hungry, so Stephen and I regretfully leave the best seat in the house and are back on the sidewalk. I try not to breathe in as we walk past smokers chatting outside of bars.
9:50 Mmm, a diner! With lovely red seats and real flowers on the table.

10:45 One burger and a mountain of Cajun fries later, Stephen is getting anxious about missing the show. Back on the street.
10:50 We flash the guy with all the tattoos our stamped hands. A hundred more people have emerged at the 40 Watt and the best seat in the house is long gone. Darn. Some kind of hurried activity is happening on the stage. Yes! We got here just in time for the band.
11:00 Checking out the pool room, where the only comfortable open seats remain. I did squats in my prenatal workout earlier in the day and am not about to punish my aching legs by standing any longer than I have to.
11:15 Something screeches over an amp. They're starting! Back into the main room we go. Wait... it's only the second opener. And the amps are way too loud. I start contemplating whether this experience is going to be worth losing a portion of my hearing for. Stephen doesn't think it's too loud, but that's only because his hearing has already been damaged.
11:20 I grab an empty folding chair from a nearby table and fantasize about the day when I'm so large that people will gladly offer the best seat in the house back to my pregnant self.
11:30 The opening band, a funky Mississippi blues duo, is actually really, really good and quite entertaining. It's nice to hear some live music again.
12:00 Making the first trip to the bathroom, where the real challenge of the night lies: the art of choosing the cleanest stall in a filthy club. I go for the one on the far right and try to lock the stall door while touching as little as possible. Toilet paper? Check. "Vagina Warriors" is written on the stall door. Hmmm.
12:30 It's already after midnight, and the roadies are just beginning to set up for Lucero. This is going to be a long night.
12:45 Lucero, in all of it's growling glory, finally begins. The singer is as terrible as I remembered from the cds, but there's a pleasant surprise on the stage to drown him out: a horn section, a pedal steel guitarist, and a keyboardist. Hurrah!
12:55 My hearing has become numb so I resort to people watching. There is an interesting mix of boot-wearing hipsters, boot-wearing sorority girls, and boot-wearing rednecks. And somehow they are all intermingling in a drunken harmony. Everyone seems so young and unable to handle their alcohol. Ahh, undergrads...
1:00 Unfortunately, the dancing at these kind of shows is never entertaining to watch. There are the "head-nodders," the "knee-benders," the "side-swayers." If they really get into it, they might nod their head and bend their knees at the same time. And then there is always the one or two completely uninhibited (completely inebriated) folks who flail about wildly and make everyone around them nervous. One of those uninhibited types is dancing with two guys next to us in dangerously high heels. I try to maintain a safe distance from her wobbly twists and turns.
1:05 There's a couple doing a box step! Impressive!
1:20 Everyone at the 40 Watt is completely wasted by now, except for the bouncers, the musicians, and me. The crowd is a mass of confused stumbling and slurring. Someone near the stage tries a failed attempt at bodysurfing. I'm feeling very sober, very old, and very pregnant.
1:35 Time for the second trip to the girls' room. I marvel at the fact that, unlike everyone else, I'm able to walk in a straight path without stumbling. The Vagina Warriors stall miraculously still has TP, but the floor has acquired a new sticky finish.
1:40 Stephen appears to be ready to pass out (he'd been awake since 4:00 that morning) and I start easing into my plan for getting us out of there. Don't sit back down, just keep standing like it's time to go. The crowd is starting to clear away, the bouncers are collecting empty beer cans from tables, the singer is getting concerned about the inebriation of his fans.
1:45 Stephen asks if I'm ready to go (yay, the plan is working!). I try not to look too excited and casually respond that I'm ready whenever he is.
1:50 We exit the club, and are confronted by an enormous taxi parked on the street. I'm not talking about the little yellow car. I'm talking about a 16-passenger van. They'll only need about 10 more of those. We certainly don't have to worry about a designated driver. I'm thankful that I'm so used to being the DD that this is one pregnancy transition that has not been hard to get used to.
2:00 Back in the car, I marvel at my time assessment skills. Didn't I say we'd be here until 2:00? *Groan* 7:30 a.m. minus 2:00 a.m. equals five and a half hours of sleep. Minus a shower before bed equals five hours of sleep (there's no way I'm waking up in time for a shower in the morning, and we all know a trip to the gyno warrants a shower).
2:15 Back home, and someone is hungry again! Shower delayed by another snack. Now that I'm in our silent house, I notice ringing in my ears. Great. Did I really lose hearing for this?
3:00 Nice and clean, and finally getting between the sheets. Now, if only someone would stop snoring so I could go to sleep...